Tales of Symphonia Bloopers!
by Moogle Empress
Summary: Yes folks! It's back! The Blooper fan fic has returned! And hopefully, it's better than ever! Come and join us in Namco studios where we go behind the scenes. Just beware of the insanity inside, seriously...
1. Blooper reel 1: Just another day

**Tales of Symphonia Bloopers**

Disclaimer: I do not own Tales of Symphonia. Plain and Simple. Get it through your heads!

Summery: Yes folks! It's back! The Blooper fan fic has returned! And hopefully, it's better than ever! Come and join us in Namco studios where we go behind the scenes. Just beware of a crazy little angel called Mithos, a ticked off director, and a cast unlike the world has ever seen! Seriously...

Important Note: I am **not** copying this idea from FreekyAnimegal. I have a different style. LOL

But I would like to thank her for inspiring me to bring the old blooper back from the dead! Thank you very much, Freekyanimegal! n.n

**_Blooper Reel 1: Just another day_**

At the VERY begining.

Kratos gets ready to say the prologe. "Are you sure this is right?" Kratos raised an eyebrow.

"Yes! Now take places everyone. Ready? Annnddddd...Action!" The director told him and started the scene.

The music comes in and Kratos begins his lines.

"Once upon a time, there existed a great tree of-" Kratos started.

"MARTEL!" Mithos' voice boomed in.

"What the hell?" Kratos went bug eyed.

Mithos comes running in and hides behind Kratos.

"Martel! Call off the wild beast you call your "fiance!" Mithos squeeked as Yuan entered the room.

"Where are you, Mithos?" Yuan looked mad and had his weapon out as well.

"Yuan, please!" Martel tried to calm him down.

"Cuuuuut! Mithos! Yuan! You two ruined the scene!" The director shouted through his megaphone.

"It's his fault! He stole the ring I was going to give to Martel!" Yuan pointed accusing Mithos.

"So? You never give it to her in the game." Mithos narrowed his eyes.

"That's it! Spark wave!" Yuan casted his spell.

"NOT ON THE SE-!" Kratos and the director shouted before the set went "Kaboom!" thanks to Yuan's spark wave.

Everyone was still alive, but the set was no more.

"YOU DESTORYED THE SET! THIS IS COMING OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK, YUAN!" The director shouted outloud.

"What? Nooooooo!" Yuan complained.

"Ha! Sucker." Mithos smirked.

However Martel pulled on Mithos' ear. "Mithos, the ring, now." Martel said.

"Okay, okay! Just quit it!" Mithos said through his pain..

Yuan and Kratos sweatdropped as they saw Martel recive the ring from Mithos. "Why didn't you just do that, Yuan?" Kratos asked.

Yuan silently wept.

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At the very begining...AGAIN!

"Okay, let's try this again. We managed to find a new set in the end. Okay then, ready...And action!" The director sighed.

Music starts up again.

"Once upon a time, there existed a giant tree of-" Kratos started again.

"DAD!" Lloyd appeared in the set. "Do you know where I left my swords? Genis was snickering for some reason and I can't find them." Lloyd asked.

Kratos did a anime fall. "Lloyd! We are filming! Couldn't wait until we were finished?" Kratos said angerly.

"You were filming?" Lloyd tilted his head to one side like the baka he was.

" Cut! There was a sign saying "DON'T DISTURB!" Can't you read?" The director hissed.

"Oh that, let's see..."Don't bring ruin manaics?" Lloyd tried to read the sign.

"My son can't even read?" Kratos turned a little purple.

"Nah, I'm just kidding, I knew it said "Don't disturb." Lloyd grinned.

"THEN GET OUT OF THE SET!" Everyone in the room besides Lloyd shouted and Lloyd ran out as if his life depended on it.

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At the Begining ( I swear this is last time. XP)

"Okay...Let's do this again. Ready? And action!" The director sighed and started the scene.

Music starts up again.

"Once upon a time, there is existed a great tree of-" Kratos started but however...

"Kupo!" A moogle entered the set.

Everyone went bug eyed.

"What the hell is this?" Kratos pointed.

"Kupo?" The moogle looked confused.

"I know just how to get rid of something like this." The director smiled evily. " Ohhhh Raineeee. There's an unknown creature for you to study!" The director got out his cellphone and called Raine.

Raine crashed through the wall. "WHERE?" Raine was in ruin mode. The Moogle went visably pale. "KUPOOOOOOOO!" And it ran away for dear life.

"Come back here!" Raine got her net out and started chasing after it. "Muahhahahahhaha!" Raine laughed and crashed through another.

Kratos sighed and looked ready to go into the verge of tears. "Can we take a break? Please?"

"Godamnit! Raine could of used the doors instead of breaking the walls." The director shouted.

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At the Iselia school.

Raine was doing her action on throwing the easer at Lloyd, instead it hit the window and broke it.

"Oops." Raine sweatdropped.

"Godamnit Raine! Those windows aren't cheap! Hit Lloyd!" The director shouted.

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Iselia School. Take 2

Raine threw the easer again but it hit Kratos.

"Cut! Kratos? Why are you here?" The director asked.

"I was praticing my camoflage techinuque. Like that Solid Snake person." Kratos said.

"Wow! I didn't see you!" Colette cheered.

"I did. That's why I threw the easer at you." Raine smiled.

"Damn!" Kratos cursed.

"Um guys, this buckets are getting heavy." Lloyd said randomly.

"Okay, retake! And get Kratos out of here!"

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At Iselia school. Take 50

"Look, it's prefectly simple Raine. Just hit Lloyd with the easer!" The director said slowly, he was starting to lose it after the 50th take on this scene.

"Okay, I finally got this." Raine nodded. She threw the easer but this time it hits the director.

Everyone on set besides the director laughed hard.

"Why me...?" The director sighed. "Cut!"

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At the Iselia chapel.

"Chosen one! You're life is mine!" Botta said his line.

"I won't let you desians get away with anything!" Lloyd brought his swords out, saying his line.

The renegades grunts were play "Go fish".

"HEY! We're filming!" The director shouted to the renegades.

"Oops sorry!" The first one said.

"I wonder if I should talk to Yuan about how we train these men." Botta sighed and then smoked on stage.

"Cut!"

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At the Renegades base.

"We don't need to chosen!" Yuan saying his line, as the renegades surrounded them. "What we need is you, Lloyd Irving!" Yuan said triumphly.

"Who's says I would help?" Lloyd asked.

"Um...Well, if you don't help..." Yuan stuttered, he then got a small white fluffy kittten out. "If you refuse, this kitty dies." Yuan said threathingly with a knife near the cat.

"Meow?" The cat squeeked.

Everyone gasped. "You are..EVIL! Pure evil I tell you!" Lloyd shouted.

"Mr. Tickles!" Mithos came on set and snatched the kitten off Yuan.

"Mr. Tickles?" Everyone whispered.

"Yuan! How dare you!" Mithos shouted and then kicked Yuan sqaurely in between his legs.

"Ugh!"

"Owwwwwwwwww..." All the cast groaned in symphanty.

"CUT! Mithos! Why did you do that?" The director screamed.

"He kidnapped Mr. Tickles and NO ONE messes with me and Mr. Tickles." Mithos said.

"Meow?" The cat squeeked again.

"Cut! Aw man, someone give something really REALLY strong." The director moaned.

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At the Iselia chapel. In the dungeon.

"Ooh, looky at the hole!" Colette said with glee.

Kratos felt very evil and pushed Colette in.

"Eeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkk!" Colette screamed until they heard a faint "splat".

"Noooooo! Colette! I love you! Come baaaaaack!" Lloyd cried.

"That felt very titantic like." Genis moaned.

"Cut! Kratos! What the hell did you do that for?" The director said.

"I felt evil." Kratos replied.

"Mithos is rubbing off on you." The director sighed.

"Yes! The maddness is spreading! Muahahahahahaaha!" Mithos laughed his trademark laugh from off set.

"I'm back!" Colette appeared back on set.

"Colette?" Everyone asked.

"They had a safety net down there. Hee hee! I'm really lucky!" Colette cheered.

"Yay!" Lloyd cheered.

"Really? Cool! Let the great Zelos try it out!" Zelos came on set and jumped through the hole.

"Is the net still down there?" Raine asked off set.

"Uhhhh...I think they took it away." Colette replied.

Everyone sweatdropped.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Zelos screams until they heard another faint "splat".

"Do we care that Zelos is dead?" Genis asked.

"YES! We need him for the film!" The director threw his megaphone at Genis which did hit him.

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At the Tower of Salvation. First encounter with Yggdrasil.

Everything was going well for once with the director. That until Mithos Yggdrasil appeared on cue but with...

" CUT! Mithos! What the hell is that cat doing with you?" The director shouted.

"Mr. Tickles? I thought it would make me look more evil if a villain had a cat." Mithos answered who was in his altered ego which was done by special effects.

"Meow."

"Actually it's the reverse. He makes you look like a puff." Kratos sighed.

"Someone take his cat away." The director said.

"Well I couldn't leave Mr. Tickles myself. Especially with Yuan!" Mithos protested.

"Get that thing out." The director continued.

"Nooooo! Don't take Mr. Tickles away!" Mithos wept and followed the person who stole the kitten.

Everyone sweatdrops.

"Who'd ever thought that Mithos was a cat lover?" Genis asked.

No one responded.

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Outside Martel Temple when Lloyd and his freinds first meet "The Renegades" again.

"I won't let you Desians get away with anything!" Lloyd said his line.

"Hey, are we The Renegades or the Desians?" Renegade 1 asked.

"Ummmmm, I think we're The Renegades." Renegade 2 answered

"CUT! How could you forget who you are! You're the guys in red! That's the renegades' colour!" The director shouted

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh..." All the Renegades nodded slowly

"Don't tell me all of you forgot!" Genis sweatdropped.

"I didn't." Botta said, smoking on set.

Yuan stomps on set and takes cigeritte out. "Smoking is bad!"

"Grrrrrrr..." The director bit his hat.

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The first meeting with Kratos.

"Who are you?" Lloyd said his line.

"He's Kratos, the Angel Mercerary dunce." Genis narrowed his eyes and hissed.

"Wait, is that part of the script?" Kratos had a question mark over his head and got the script out.

"Cut! Genis, that's later on!" The director shouted.

"It is?" Genis sweatdrops as he asked.

"Great! Now we have to do the whole scene all over again!" Lloyd complained, throwing his swords which had missed Zelos by an inch.

"Eep!" Zelos only said.

"Oops." Genis said quietly.

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Outside Iselia forest.

Lloyd and Genis were waiting for Noishe to appear.

"Where the hell is he!" Lloyd said fustrated.

"You didn't have your coffee today did you?" Genis asked in his "Knowing all" tone.

"Will someone find that mutt!" The director asked the staff.

Off stage, Noishe was sleeping.

"Noishe! Get your butt out here, or no food for you for the whole day!" Lloyd threatened.

"Whine!" Noishe got up instiantly and zoomed to the set.

"Works everytime." Lloyd snickered evily.

"Okay! We're good to go!" Genis said to the staff.

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Dirk's house.

"Dwarven Vow 2: What is dwarven vow 2?" Dirk asked, turning to the director while Lloyd was laughing hard.

"It's "Lying is the first step to theviery." The director sighed.

"Ah right. Okay, let's try again." Dirk nodded.

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Dirk's house Take 2

"Dwarven vow 2: Oh (Bleep) I forgot it again! I hate these Vows! Where's the writer! I'm going to kill him!" Dirk shouted and went off to search for the writer.

Lloyd was laughing even harder this time while the Director was hitting himself with the script book.

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On the terrace at night time.

"We'll be leaving at noon, would come to the village by then?" Colette asked

"Yeah, sure." Lloyd nodded

Then a mobile phone goes off with the ringtone "Barbie girl".

"Who's phone is that?" Lloyd asked as he got his phone from his pocket

Colette was checking her phone as well.

"Who's phone is that! Turn it off!" The director shouted

Off set, Yuan was looking at his phone.

"Sorry, it was my phone." Yuan said nervously as he sweatdropped.

"YUAN!" Everyone shouted

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In Iselia when The Desians attacked.

"You, Lloyd Irving have in contact with body host A012-" Forcystus was saying his line until...He was then interupted by The director.

"NO! That's what Kvar says! Your's is Marble's number!" The director shouted

"Oops, sorry. Does that mean we have to start again?" Forcystus asked.

"Grrrrrr...That means I now have to rebuild the whole set YOU burned!" He growled

"Heh, my bad." Forcystus scratched his head.

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On the field, where Lloyd gets a letter from Dirk.

"Ummm, Noishe? Where's that letter?" Lloyd asked.

"Whine." Noishe whined.

"I think Noishe might of ate it." Genis sweatdropped.

"WHAT!" Lloyd shouted

"That stupid mutt! Get a new piece of paper!" The director ordered

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In the Renegades' base in Triet, where Lloyd meets Yuan and Botta comes in.

"Oh (Bleep) I forgot my (Bleep) Line!" Botta swore.

Yuan, Lloyd and The Renegades laugh hard.

"Cut!" The director said.

"Kill meeeee! Kill meeeee!" Botta went on his knees.

"I SAID CUT!" The director shouted and started to write a sucide note.

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Outside the seal of fire temple.

"This thing looks like it will break at any moment." Colette said, looking at the oracle stone.

"Nah, it's soild as a rock." Lloyd poked it but then it shattered into pieces.

"Oops..." Lloyd sweatdropped.

"LLOYD!" Everyone except Colette yelled at the hero.

"AHHHHH! THAT TOOK AGES! SOMEONE GET SOME GLUE!" The director pancked and asked one of the staff.

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Izoold, on the boat.

"Has anyone seen Genis?" Raine asked

"I know he can't swim, my agent told me, so if anything happens to him. I'm finished." Kratos replied

"He wouldn't go swimming if he didn't know how to. Would he?" Lloyd asked nervously.

"Look! Collette gasped pointing to Genis in the ocean.

"HELLLLLP!" Genis was splashing around in the water franticly.

"Damn it! Who threw him in the water?" The director cursed.

Zelos was at shore.

"What? He called me a wuss!" Zelos said in defense.

"When I get out of the ocean, Zelos, YOU'LL BE SORRY!" Genis said softly at first and then screamed.

Remiel came over and fished him out.

"Thanks, you're a nice person when your not acting." Genis thanked

"I'm an actor, of course I'm not like that in real life. Being evil is not my thing." Remiel shook his head.

"Now, what was I going to do?" Genis asked himself and then looked at Zelos.

10 seconds later.

"WAHHHHHHHHH! THE KID GONE PSYCHO!" Zelos screamed with bug eyes and running away from like 20 fireballs.

Genis followed him in hot pursuit with a demonic voice with eyes of fire "GET BACK HERE ZELOS! ALL I JUST WANNA DO IS TALK!"

"Let me say it...Cut!" Lloyd said.

Everyone sighed.

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Palmacosta, at the square when the excution is taking place.

"Before we start this, can I clap those clipy things?" Lloyd looked at the take marker and asked.

"Lloyd, you're an actor and the main character as well. Get over here!" Kratos ordered

"Pretty please!" Lloyd begged

"Do you know we were rolling?" The director hissed.

"We were?" Lloyd asked naively.

"And my mom thought I was stupid!" Magnius muttered

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In Thoda Gyser, where Lloyd has to get the statue.

Lloyd's stunt double was doing his part when he sliped and the ice melted so he fell into the Gyser.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! It's (Bleep) Hot! GET ME OUT!" The stunt double screamed.

Everyone on set gave him symphathy moans as he fell in.

"CUT! DAMN IT! Get a new stunt double!" The director shouted and asked the nearest staff beside him.

"Ouch! Good thing I ask for a stunt double. Where would the flim be without me?" Lloyd said.

"A good movie." Kratos whispered.

Everyone quietly snickered.

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Asgard Ruins, where Raine takes over the sacrifice ritual.

Raine was doing her part on the ritual and then she broke into singing "Colours of the wind" from Pocahuntus.

"What the hell is she singing?" Kratos said in a monotoned voice

"She wouldn't win Pop Idol, that's for sure." Genis muttered, covering his ears.

"SOMEONE MAKE HER STOP! THE PAIN! THE AGONY!" Lloyd withered on the ground in a fetal postion, scared for life.

"Cover your ears, Mr. Tickles!" Mithos yelled off set.

"Meow?"

"Cut! For Martel sake, it will be christmas before we finish this film!" The Director moaned.

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At Asgard Ranch, at the final confrontion with Kvar.

"So you see I was trying to get a part in the new "Star Wars" as Darth Vader." Kvar was talking to Lloyd with a cup of tea in hand.

"Really? How's it going so far?" Lloyd asked friendly like.

"Right now, they are saying I would make a good Dark lord. Do you think I should take that part?" Kvar asked.

"Well, I'm not sure about you, but I would-" Lloyd was speaking until the director did a "Ahem!".

"HEY! WE'VE BEEN ROLLING FOR THE LAST 2 MINUTES! YOU SHOULD BE FIGHTING!" He shouted.

"Oops." Lloyd sweatdropped.

"What? We're on! Sorry about that." Kvar appoglised.

"Get ready for take 2." The director sighed and slumped in his chair and waved in a "shoo" manner.

"Let us continue this afterwards." Kvar said.

"I'm all for that." Lloyd nodded.

Kvar took his cup off stage and went back on, getting into his pose, talking to Pronyma) "Okay, ready."

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At The Tower of Salvation, after they defeat Remeil.

Kratos appeared as it said in the script.

"Lord Kratos, Fill me with the powers of darkness!" Remiel spoke.

"Wait a second! That's not the script!" Kratos shouted.

"CUT! CUT! THAT'S FROM KINGDOM HEARTS!" The director bellowed.

Ansem from kingdom hearts appears and shoves a piece of paper at the director.

"What's that?" Remiel asked.

"NOW WE GOT A LAWSUIT FOR STEALING SQUARE-ENIX'S LINES!" The director yelled.

"Does that mean I'm fired?" Remiel asked very quietly.

"It would be. BUT YOU STILL NEED TO FINISH THIS (BLEEP) FLIM! I WILL TAKE THIS OUT OF YOUR PAY!" The director said softly and then shouted so loud that even Martel awoke.

Martel: HEY! I'm playing MY ROLE here!" She shouted.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" He fell to his knees and hit his head on the floor.

"Better you then me" Kratos said, smirking.

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At the tower of Salvation, when they meet Mithos the first time.

Mithos does his spell but it comes out as a small puff. "Ummmmmmmmmmm, is it meant to do that?" Mithos asked.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO SPECIAL EFFECTS FOR MAGIC!" The director got his cellphone and bellowed at the special effects group on it.

Mithos turned to his hand to find out what's wrong with the special effects, then a large fireball came out "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I'M ON FIRE! GET SOME WATER! GET A FIRE EXGUISHER! GET A BUCKET OF WATER! ANYTHING!" Screaming while running around like an idiot.

Everyone on set had gone silent and had sweatdropped.

"What was I thinking! I should of took the script for "Kingdom Hearts 2" but no, I took this one! Get some water on him!" The director finally wept.

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In Meltokio, where Lloyd and friends meet Zelos.

Zelos was doing his actions as said in the script.

Colette does her part of flipping him, but he crashed off set.

"WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Zelos yelped as he crashed headfirst into Martel's trailer. CRASH!

"EEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKK! YOU PERV!" Martel whacked with his staff and Zelos was thrown into the sky.

"Oops! I threw him too hard again didn't I?" Colette said sadly.

"ARRGH! Someone find Zelos!" He bit into the script book and started to eat it.

"Looks like Zelos flying off again!" Zelos said as he went further into the sky and became a little star.

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Back at the Tower of Salvation.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Remiel was still crying out.

"How long has he been like this?" The director asked curiously.

Kratos looked at his watch. "For an hour." Kratos answered.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Remiel continued.

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Back The tower of Salvation...again.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" He continued still.

"This has got to stop!" Kratos finally snapped and was getting ready to use "Judgement".

"Try knocking him out." Lloyd tried to hold back his father.

"SHUT UP REMEIL! FINE! I'LL GIVE YOU HALF YOUR PAY!" The director shouted and threw his megaphone at him.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Remiel kept on until he finally stopped. "I'm done."

"FINALLY!" Everyone cast and staff alike shouted and partied.

"Don't ever become a director unless you can handle all of this." The director wept as he turned to the camera.

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ME: Heya folks! How did you like it? I used the only chapter that I had found left of my old verison and extended it. Please review back and let me know what you think. I might be a little out of touch of my old blooper roots but I hope to get better with each new chapter.

Oh yeah! Like I did in my old blooper fan fic. I'm going to be interviewing the cast! If you have any questions you would like to ask this merry group of misfits, please let me know. I plan on starting the interviews about after chapter 2. I'll let you know in chapter 2 who I'll be interviewing first.

Well, gotta go. Oh yeah! Please no flames or insults. I burn easily at them. See ya then! Moogle Empress out!

Moogle: Kupo!


	2. Blooper Reel 2: Stand in mayhem

Note: This was also in my original work, but I wasn't able to save it so here it is, it might be a little different from the original.

**Blooper Reel 2: Colette's and Mithos' stand ins mayhem**

At Iselia.

"May I have your attention please everyone?" The director said to the cast who were partying cause it was Lloyd's birthday. When no one heard him, he grew a vain. "LISTEN TO ME DAMNIT!" The director shouted and fired a gun.

Everyone became deathly silent.

"Thank you! As you know, Colette has the sudden case of flu. So-" The director started.

"Wait...Does that mean...?" Yuan trailed off as the horror risen from the depths.

"Could it be?" Lloyd turned a little purple.

"THAT MEANS STAND INS!" Mithos screamed.

Everyone went into a panic, running around like loons.

"Shut up!" The director blarred into the megaphone.

Everyone went silent again, for all they knew, they should NEVER...EVER disobey the "Big cheese".

"Now then, meet our stand in Colette!" The director pointed to a blonde head next to him wearing Colette's clothing.

"HEY! That Colette stand in...IS A GUY! UGH! I'VE BEEN FOREVER TRAMATIZED!" Zelos screamed in horror.

"Um, well...I couldn't find many blondes like Colette so he had to do. Besides no one would notice!" The director sweatdropped and then grinned.

It was Roxas from Kingdom Hearts 2, he was dressed in Colette's clothing with a false wig. "Hey! I didn't even want to be here! I was bribed!" Roxas shouted.

Sora and Riku appeared through the set doors.

"There you are, Roxas." Riku said.

"Ummm...Why are you wearing girl clothing?" Sora asked.

"Wa-wait! I can explain!" Roxas started.

"Are you a cross-dresser?" Riku smirked.

"I'm SO gonna tell Kairi and Namine about this!" Sora grinned.

"Nooooooo! Don't tell Namine or anyone! I have a reputation to uphold!" Roxas panicked.

"Quick! Let's make a run for it!" Sora laughed.

"I'm sure the girls and everyone else will love to hear this." Riku smiled evily amd they both ran off at rocket speed.

"Nooo! Don't tell them! Screw this! I quit!" Roxas yelled and threw off the wig then chased after the boys.

"Okaayyy...Yo, can you find me some other stand ins? The one I was able to find just ran off." The director got his cellphone and called the "stand in agency."

"I can see...That this is going to be a disaster." Yuan sweatdropped.

Everyone nodded in agreement.

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Colette's stand in 2. (Note: You won't know who this character is unless you read "Tales of Symphonia Remix")

"Who the heck?" Genis asked.

The next unfortunate victim was Amber Aurion.

"Dad! How could you do this to me!" Amber screeched.

"Well, your mother told me to!" Kratos pointed out, remembering Anna's words.

"Lloyd? You have a sister?" Sheena gasped.

"Uh, yeah?" Lloyd said nervously.

"Hey! Your sister is H-O-T!" Zelos had heart eyes appeared.

Sheena gasped. "You stupid chosen! Then again, I knew it was a matter of time." Sheena hissed and shurgged.

""Hey, babe." Zelos got nearer to Amber.

Kratos and Lloyd looked ready to kill.

"Sorry, I'm taken already." Amber smirked in victory.

"What? Who could overcome my hansome looks?" Zelos asked.

Sheena gagged at the "Hansome looks" part.

"Amber! There you are! We need you back on the TOSR set." Kite appeared.

"Why didn't Chester come get me?" Amber asked.

"Um, that's just it, I need your help to help him." Kite sweatdropped.

Zelos' pupils shrunk and his mouth fell to the floor. "YOU LUCKY BRAT! How come you get to be the boyfriend of this sexy Aurion girl!" Zelos shouted.

"What are you talking about? I'm her friend, not her "Boyfriend", her boyfriend's back on the set." Kite snapped.

Zelos suddenly felt very stupid. "Oh..."

"Well, sorry guys. My film comes first before anyone else. Oh yeah and Zelos..." Amber said and looked at Zelos. 5 seconds later, she was brutelly attacking Zelos, after that she left, leaving Zelos in a bloody heap.

"I can see where she gets her violent nature from..." Yuan sweatdropped, looking at Kratos.

"Um, actually, that's Anna's nature." Kratos said nervously.

"Oh my god! My dad gets beaten up by mom?" Lloyd gasped.

"What? Anna IS vicious. Espcially when she was pregant with you and Amber." Kratos said.

"I would of LOVED to see that." Mithos snickered.

"Can we heal Zelos please?" The director sighed.

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Colette's final stand in.

"Well, what do you think?" The director asked.

"Wait a minute...MITHOS?" Lloyd gasped.

Indeed, it was Mithos who was in Colette's clothing. Everyone turned at the director. Except for Zelos.

"AH! I'M TRAMATIZED AGAIN! Now I'll never look at a woman right ever again!" Zelos screamed, that was before Sheena whacked him and gave him the K.Oed look.

"What? The stand in agency said they didn't have anyone aviliable at the moment. So Mithos had to do." The director shurgged.

"I am not a femboy damnit!" Mithos hissed and threw his wig off.

"Actually you sorta are." Yuan pointed out.

"MARRRTELLLLL!" Mithos went crying off the set, calling for Martel.

"Wow, 4000 years old and he acts like a toddler?" Raine blinked.

Martel came on set, looking mad at Yuan and had her staff out ready.

"Wa-wait! Martel! Honey! I didn't mean it! I-!" Yuan stepped back a bit. However that was when he got whacked by the mighty staff of Martel.

"I pity him." Zelos flinched, remembering he too was hit by the staff of doom that belonged to Martel.

"I thougth Martel was meant to be a pacifist." Regal asked.

"Obviously not in real life." Kratos sighed.

"Why Colette? Why did you have to have a cold during the filming period?" The director cried.

"Hi everyone!" Colette appeared.

"COLETTE!" Lloyd went over and hugged.

Everyone was mumbling "Get a room" while this took place.

"Yes! Now we can begin properly!" The director cheered.

"Yes, but..." Kratos turned at where Martel was still whacking Yuan with her staff. You could even hear Yuan scream bloody murder through the cheering, the mumbles and even more cheering from everyone else. But no one besides Kratos paid any mind. XP

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At the tower of Salvation.

"Great, Mithos refuses to come out of his trailer now." The director hissed.

"Does that mean?" Lloyd asked.

"Yes, more stand ins." The director nodded.

Everyone wept silently.

"Hey! I could be the main enemy!" Yuan pointed out.

Everyone was silent, so silent you could hear crickets in the background.

"Well I could..." Yuan trailed off.

"Shut up." Everyone hissed.

"Okay, let's see if the agency as ANYONE." The director reached for the cellphone and called the agency again.

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Mithos' stand in 1.

"No...Way...!" Lloyd looked bug eyed at the stand in.

"He looks too goth-like." Genis noted.

"He's scary!" Colette whined while hugging a Lloyd and doggy plushie.

Sephiroth looked just as mad as the director would on a bad day. Which was everyday actually. "Like I even wanted to be here, I'm already in FF advent children, thank you! And what do you have against goths?" Sephiroth complained and pointed to Genis.

"Well, you do look like a goth." Genis said honestly.

"That's it! Meet that Goddess Martel of yours in the sky!" Sephiroth yelled and got his bad ass massume sword out.

"Mommmmmmmmyyyyyyyyyy!" All three ran all over the set, getting away from the derranged manaic known as Sephiroth.

"100 dollars on Sephiroth." Sheena betted with the other TOS cast.

"You know, Director, I could do Mithos' role." Yuan said.

"No Yuan! And that's final!" The director quietly hissed and rubbed his temples on his forehead as this scene went bizzarely wrong. That was when the cellphone rang.

"Hello? Oh Cloud! Huh? Yeah, I was borrowing Sephiroth but it seems you can have him back, since he's trying to kill of three of the main heroes." The director said in the cellphone while Lloyd, Colette and Genis were screaming their heads off with Sephiroth chasing them and getting ready to cast "Supernova" on them.

Over at the FF7 set.

"Oh okay then. Bring him in soon." Cloud nodded and turned off his phone. "He said that Sephiroth is with the TOS group at the moment."

"God have mercy on thier souls." All of the other FF cast prayed.

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Mithos' Stand in 2.

Everyone looked bug eyed and gapped at the sight of stand in 2.

"HELL NO!" All of them shouted.

"There is no way that thing could strike fear into the hearts of people." Kratos noted.

"Then again, Mithos isn't that scary either." Yuan pointed out.

"But I mean...Look!" Lloyd pointed out to the stand in.

It was a Moogle who was wearing Yggdrasil's clothing with a blonde wig tied near his pom-pom.

"Kupo?" The moogle spoke.

"I must resist...I must resist...I-!" Raine was trying to coax herself to not going up there and grab the creature. However...She snapped. "I MUST HAVE THAT MOOGLE!" Raine went into Ruin mode with a large net.

The Moogle paled with big bug eyes as big as someone's head. "Kupoooooooooo! Save me! Kupo!" The moogle flew as fast as he could off the set.

"COME BACK HERE!" Raine chased after the moogle.

Everyone simply sighed.

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Mithos' final stand in. (Well sorta of.)

"I give up, I'll just try to ask Mithos to come out of the trailer." The director sighed in defeat.

That was until Dhoas from TOP entered the set and started destoying everything. "I shall destory all humans! Muahahahahahhaa!" Dhaos laughed.

"Is this part of the script?" Lloyd asked.

"No, you idiot!" Sheena hissed.

"Please don't call Lloyd an idiot." Colette looked tearfully.

The rest of the TOP cast entered the destoryed set.

Cless got a megaphone of his own. "DHAOS! OUR SET WAS TO THE LEFT! NOT TO THE RIGHT!" Cless said through the megaphone.

"I can't beleive he was stupid enough to enter a set with the name in big letters. "Tales of Symphonia set." Chester moaned.

"I have to admit, anyone could see the that notice board." Arche nodded.

The director looked ticked off. "Grrrrrr! I placed a sign big enough for even a elephant to see! All of you are going to fix this set with your own money!"

"WHAT?" Everyone in the TOP cast shouted.

"Well, there's goes my paycheck again. Now I'll never pay the rent now." Klarth sighed.

"Thanks a lot Dhaos." Chester hissed.

"Oops..." Dhaos only said.

Mithos finally arrived with Mr. Tickles in his hands. "I'm here finally, GOD DAMNIT! What happened the set?" Mithos shouted when he saw the damage.

"Trust me, Mithos. You're better off not knowing." Kratos sighed.

**Note: Hold on folks! The chapter isn't over yet, I give you a blooper reel extra! Enjoy! PS: The theme is Mithos. XD **

**Blooper Reel Extra: Sleeping Mithos**

At Derris Kharlan.

Lloyd and the others are at Derris Kharlan, ready to fight Mithos.

"Alright Mithos! Get ready to...fight...?" Lloyd started and then trailed off when he saw Mithos at the throne...

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..." Mithos snored slightly while standing up.

"He's asleep?" Genis asked.

"And standing too? Oh my god! He's inheirted Lloyd's ability to sleep while standing!" Raine went into Ruin mode.

"Please don't use him for an crazy expirment, Raine. We won't have a main boss if you do." Lloyd sweatdropped.

"Oh my god! Lloyd made an actual clever point?" The director gasped at Lloyd's sudden stroke of genius!

"Sh-shut up!" Lloyd blushed furiously.

"Well anyway...WAKE MITHOS UP!" The director said softly and then bellowed so loud that the set threatened to be blown away.

"How?" Colette asked, tilted her head to one side.

No one responded for a long while. Until Yuan popped out of nowhere and saw the sad pridiciment that Lloyd and co were in.

"I have idea!" Yuan said as a lightbulb went off above his head, it then went out due to a short fuse though. Everyone huddle around to hear Yuan's oh so clever plan...

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3 minuites later.

Yuan appeared again with a bucket of water. "This will work, I used this one Kratos so many times." Yuan smirked.

"You know I hate you very much, right?" Kratos hissed.

Yuan threw the bucket over Mithos. However...

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..." Mithos remained asleep.

"WHAT! HOW COULD IT NOT WORK? HE'S NOT HUMAN I TELL YOU! NOT-!" Yuan cried out.

Kratos knocked him out with his so awesomely cool flameberge before he could rant more about this failed plan and he then dragged him out while Yuan was still in a heap and had the X.X look on his face.

"Any other ideas?" Zelos asked the group.

There was only complete silence.

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2 minutes later.

"This might work. I had to use this on Lloyd many times since he kept SLEEPING IN!" Sheena started normally until she screamed in Lloyd's ear. She was holding a alarm clock.

"Um, sorry?" Lloyd smiled nervously.

Sheena just sighed and set the alarm off. The alarm rang so loud that even the dead could hear it.

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..." Still no avail of awakening Mithos.

"Wow, Mithos has got you case of sleeping while standing, BAD. I mean you're as heavy sleeping as you come." Sheena awed.

"WHY DOES EVERYONE PICK ON ME?" Lloyd cried. And little Colette soothed him while everyone sweatdropped at the fact this crybaby was the hero.

"Have you woken him up yet? I'll cut your pay if you don't get Mithos up soon. Time is money, you know." The director asked as he was looking at the newspaper with a cup of coffee in his hand.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Everyone moaned, except for Mithos that is.

"How about that sleeping beauty trick? You know, kiss him to awaken?" Zelos asked.

Everyone looked at Zelos bug eyed and gapped. "DEAR GOD NO!" Everyone screamed and went into a panic.

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4 minutes later.

"This must wake him up. He hates this song more than Yuan and everyone else present except for Genis." Kratos said as he got the music machine ready.

"Why not me?" Genis asked.

"Well, you do play as the Mithos friend yet you aren't Mithos' friend." The director said.

Lloyd being the baka he was, his mind was blank.

"That is so confusing." Genis moaned, even though he knew what the director meant.

"Okay! This is it! Brace yourselves...For the horror..." Kratos warned and finally pressed play. The song "Oops, I did it again" by Britney Spears blarred on.

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz..." And Mithos was still winning! Unlike Lloyd and the others.

"AHHHHH! The horror!" Lloyd writhed on the ground.

"I think I'm going to commit sucide!" Genis said.

"Not before me first!" Zelos said.

Everyone just ran over the place like loons and tried to block the song from thier ears.

"Aw geez, I guess we only have on option left..." The director sighed.

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1 hour later.

Yuan had Mithos' kitten "Mr. Tickles" in his hands. "Do I have to do this?" Yuan whined pitfully.

"C'mon, I'll give you double pay for this." The director begged. He really wanted to get this set finished.

"Hey, that's better than what I earn!" Lloyd whined.

"But it is the only way to awaken Mithos." Presea spoke.

"Indeed. This has to be done, for we know what Mithos is like about "Mr. Tickles." Regal nodded.

"What kind of name is "Mr. Tickles?" Lloyd asked.

Yuan gulped and brought his knife out at the kitten and said. "Mithos, I'm threatening to kill Mr.Tickles again." Yuan said in a monotone voice.

This time, Mithos opened his eyes wide opened. "WHAT? DIE YUAN!" Mithos lunged at Yuan, while the kitten scampered back into the arms of Kratos.

"Ooh! OW! I didn't know he could twist a foot that far!" Lloyd flinched at the damage Mithos was inflicting upon Yuan.

"Ow! Damnit! Ow! Mithos! No! Not the huge axe, mercy! Ahhh!" Yuan cried out.

Everyone contunued to flinch and look away at times of the graphical violence he was placing upon poor Yuan.

"He's definately gonna need that pay rise after this..." The director sweatdropped. "Oh well, at least Mithos is now awaken! Let's get this set going. Ummm, could someone break those two up though?"

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Fini!

Now then, the next chapter is the interview with the first character, Lloyd, who will be interviewed the by the famous, ever so cute, Mog!

Mog: Thank you ME, Kupo! One request though, keep that ruin manaic away from me!

ME: Um okay. I'll come across that bridge when we get to the Raine interview. Anyway, if you feel the need to ask Lloyd anything about his love life, his own real life, or anything else! Let me know in your review and if you're lucky! You questions will be answered!

Mog: Kupo! That's right!

ME: Since you're here, Mog. Mind telling all the folks out there?

Mog: Sure! Please read and reivew, kupo! But please do not send flames or insults, kupo!

ME: Well, that's it for now everyone. Please send your interview questions through your review and Mog will speak them out to the TOS crew. Bye for now!

Mog: See ya! Kupo!


	3. Interview: Lloyd

Hiya folks! I'm so sorry for not updating at all lately!

I had LOADS of problems with my computer. You see, my computer caught a virus and now it won't even start up again! All my files were on it too... T.T

Mithos: You just HAD to download that file didn't you?

ME: WAHHHHHHHHHHH! My poor computer!! (Weeps)

Mao: But aren't you getting a new computer?

ME: Oh yeah, I forgot. Yeah, I'm getting a new computer for christmas so for now, I'm reduced to going to college computers and using my dad's computer to update. Anyway, here is the long awaited chapter! Oh yeah! For those who know Mao from the fan fic: Kratos' brother, he's going to help Mog with the interviews! Enjoy!

Chester: It better be worth it...

**Interview: Lloyd**

"Kupo! Welcome everyone to our first interview of the TOS cast! And this is my co-host, Mao, who plays Kratos' brother in another ME fan fic: Kratos' brother!" Mog chirped as the lights came on.

"How original can you get with that?" Mao sarcasticly remarked.

The authouress,out of nowhere, threw a book at Mao and it hit. "OW!" He cursed.

"Errr...Anyway! Let's introduce our first TOS character, the main character himself: Lloyd! Kupo!" Mog said.

Drum rolls were cued...But Lloyd was no where to be seen.

"Ummmm...Lloyd? Hello?" Mog asked.

Mao sighed and got a huge megaphone out. "LLOYD IRVING/AURION! REPORT TO THE INTERVIEW SET NOW!" Mao yelled into the megaphone to increase the volume of his voice.

Finally, Lloyd popped his out. "Oh? We're on?" Lloyd asked.

Mao gave Lloyd the "Aurion Death glare".

"Okay! Okay!" Lloyd flinched from the glare and walked on set and finally sat down in the interview chair.

"Kupo! Now we can start, so Lloyd, how did you get the role?" Mog asked.

"The role? Let's see...Oh yeah! I got a call from my agent, saying about they needed a idealstic, two-sword weilding idiotic hero for the latest Namco game, and they picked me!" Lloyd replied cheerfully.

"I can see why they chose you." Mao sarcasticly raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

"Is that a compliment? Thanks Mao!" Lloyd replied rather dumbly, not knowing what Mao meant by that.

Mao muttered "idiot" under his voice.

Mog just sweatdropped. "Um, moving onwards, we have got questions from reviewers that would to ask you some questions. Do you mind?" Mog told Lloyd.

"Sure, ask away." Lloyd nodded.

"Okay, first one is from Royal Fanatic, are you really that bad at school, or did they ask you to be dumb in the game?" Mog asked.

"Hey! I got A's in all my subjects!" Lloyd found that question offensive.

"WHAT?! REALLY?" Mao sprayed the water he was drinking back into the glass out of complete shock.

While off stage.

"Oh my god! Kratos! You're son is actually smart in real life?" Yuan yelled.

Kratos just nodded.

"Man, I never thought I'd see the day." Genis sarcasticly smiled.

"Wow! Yay for Lloyd!" Colette cheered while she waved flags with Lloyd's face on them.

Back on stage however...

"Yeah, see? I'm smart." Lloyd grinned.

"Wow, you would of fooled us." Mao and Mog both said in union.

"Hey!" Lloyd snapped.

"Whatever, with that answered, let's move on. This question is from two different reviewers with the same idea called Zorfendor and Eternum123. Their question is who do you love really out of all the TOS girls? Heh, this will be good." Mao asked with a evil smile.

"Who do you think it is? It's always been Colette! Wasn't there enough scenes in the game to prove that?" Lloyd answered.

"True, but you know, people have different opinions and so on and so forth." Mao shurgged.

Off stage again.

"Kratos, you do know that this could mean you might have Colette for an daughter in law?" Yuan said.

"Darling? Aren't you being a bit forward?" Martel asked.

Kratos went bug-eyed at the thought.

"I always knew Lloyd at it going for Colette." Sheena smiled.

"I love you too, Lloyd!" Colette cheered happily until she tripped by mistake.

"Love works in mysterious ways." Genis sweatdropped.

Back on stage.

"Kupo! Let's move onwards, this question is from Cherry-sama, "why your legs so poofy, Lloyd?" Mog replied.

"Not my fault! Blame the costume designer!" Lloyd said in defense.

"So the costume designer has a strange taste for clothes, I feel more sorry for Mithos in that spandex thing he has to wear when he's Yggdrasil." Mao shurgged.

Somewhere on stage, Mithos twitched with a vain. "Urge to kill...Rising!"

Back to Mog, Mao and Lloyd however.

"Well, that's all the reviewers' questions. Now we have one final basic original question like the first one made by ME. What do you plan to do after the Tales of Symphonia is completed?" Mao asked.

"I'm going to try out for Final Fantasy game! Maybe they need another hero for their next game!" Lloyd cheered.

"Don't count on it. There is no way in hell, that they would choose you..." Mao narrowed his eyes sarcasticly and whispered.

"Kupo! Thanks for joining us, Lloyd! Next time, we'll be joined by the Chosen of Sylverant, Colette Brunel!" Mog said.

"Oh god, we better be prepared, god knows what she'll destory when she trips!" Mao warned.

"Well, keep the questions coming folks. Post in your questions on anything you like to ask Colette! Well, see you soon! Kupo!" Mog cheered.

"Well, from myself, Mog and Lloyd. You'll see you in the next interview." Mao replied.

"Bye! Kupo!" Mog jumped.

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ME: Whew! I know it's not long but hey, I got a lot of updating to do. Anyway, you know the drill. Please, please, PLEASE review the chapter. No flames or insults are wanted, if any are found, they shall be ignored.

Mithos: About time!

Ion: Hiya!

Mithos: Who the hell are you?

Ion: Me? I'm Ion from Tales of the Abyss.

Mao: YES! You're finally here! Another sane person besides me and Genis in this house!

ME: I'm not that creepy, am I?

Mao and Mithos: Yes.

Ion: (Has question mark over his head)

ME: Meanies! Anyway see ya in the next chapter!

Mog: Kupo!


	4. Interview: Colette

ME: Whew! I know it's not long but hey, I got a lot of updating to do. Anyway, you know the drill. Please, please, PLEASE review the chapter. No flames or insults are wanted, if any are found, they shall be ignored.

Mithos: About time!

Ion: Hiya!

Mithos: Who the hell are you?

Ion: Me? I'm Ion from Tales of the Abyss.

Mao: YES! You're finally here! Another sane person besides me and Genis in this house!

ME: I'm not that creepy, am I?

Mao and Mithos: Yes.

Ion: (Has question mark over his head)

ME: Meanies! Anyway see ya in the next chapter!

Mog: Kupo!

**Interview: Colette**

"Kupo! Welcome back for a new interview!" Mog cheered as the lights went on.

"Today's interview is with the Chosen of Sylverant, Colette Brunel." Mao replied in a similer manner to Kratos.

"Oh, I'm on? Yaysy!" Colette chirped happily and walked on set.

"Don't trip on the-!" Mao saw the evetiable about to happen.

And so, Colette tripped over a lump on the carpet and tripped.

"Kupo." Mog only said.

"This is going to take a while..." Mao sweatdropped as he saw Colette keep tripping over basicly everything.

This went on for a good few hours until...

"I'm here!" Colette replied.

However by now, Mao fell asleep and Mog was reading.

"Um, hello?" Colette waved over the moogle.

"Huh? Oh! You made it finally! Mao! She's here!" Mog finally noticed the chosen and moved to wake up Mao.

"Not now, Kratos, I'm sleeping." Mao mumbled in his sleep.

"Uh...Mao?" Mog poked Mao and continued to until he got REALLY mad.

"DAMNIT KRATOS! I SAID-!" Mao yelled and was about to throw an fireball until he realized it was Mog. "Huh? Oh, sorry Mog. Bad habit." Mao sweatdropped at the suituation.

"Kupo, Kratos must get burned everytime he tries to wake you. Anyway, Colette's here." Mog pointed.

"Ah, you made it." Mao said.

"Yup! Um...I'm really sorry about the set..." Colette said happily and then appologised.

"Huh? AHHHHHHHHH! WHAT THE HELL?" Mao looked over her to find most of the set in peices, thanks to Colette's clumsy nature.

"You caused all this damage by yourself?!" Mog went bug-eyed.

"I'm sorry." Colette applogised again.

Mao just sighed. "Nevermind, let's start. I'll just have to tell the director we need to repair it."

"Okay!" Colette returned to happy-mode, and sat in the interview chair.

"Kupo! Let's back to the questioning. Okay, first off, how did you get your role?" Mog asked.

"Me? Ummmm...I was cleaning the house and then the phone ringed. It was my agent and she said that there was a auddition for a second main character, and they picked me!" Colette replied with a happy smile.

"You were cleaning your house? Man, it must be in shambles." Mao muttered under his breath.

"Hm?" Colette tilited her head.

"Nothing! Anyway, Question from Animesage: How do you trip by standing still? That's a good question actually." Mao asked.

"Oh! I've been able to do that since I was a little girl." Colette laughed.

"No...Way...!" Mao stared at her in shock, thinking what kind of disasters she pulled when she tripped as small girl.

"Moving onwards! Kupo! Another question from Royal-Fanatic: What did you do while you were in Rodyle's cltuches?" Mog asked.

"Oh! He's actually a nice guy when he's not playing as the mean evil grand cardidal off set! He looks after animals and we talked about puppies alot off set." Colette answered.

"FOR REAL?" Mog blinked.

Off set.

"What? Rodyle's an animal lover?" Mithos raised an eyebrow.

"..." Kratos remained VERY silent.

"Well, that's something you hear once in a blue moon." Zelos broke the silence.

"Okaayyyyyyyy...Next one, this one is from Zorfendor, What is it like to have wings and fly?" Mao asked Colette.

"It was fun! I got flying lessons but I ended up smashing some of the walls while I was flying." Colette answered.

"No wonder." Mao rolled his eyes.

"I also sang a song while I was flying too!" Colette said and began to sing "I beleive I can fly".

"No! Make it stop!" Mog pleaded.

Mao had the powerful urge to cast "Judgement" on her but that wouldn't be good for the director. "Colette!" Mao shouted and Colette stopped. "This is an interview! Not a song contest!"

"Oh, oops, sorry." Colette laughed nervously.

"Right, now that we got THAT sorted, onwards to the next question." Mao said and turned to Mog.

"Okay! Um, this is from Hiranieas, "why do you keep tripping even when flying?" Mog read the card out.

"Well, um, did that happen?" Colette tilited her head.

"Great, she's got Lloyd's forgetfulness." Mao moaned.

Off stage.

"Why you-!" Lloyd was ready to kill but Kratos refrained his son from killing his younger if not, annoying little brother.

Back on stage.

"There you have it that. Colette has become a forgetful ditzy blonde with amazing destruction powers." Mao complained.

"Thanks!" Colette did not get the sarcasm in that.

"Are they both this stupid?" Mao asked himself.

"Kupo! Let's just go on since Colette can't remeber why. It's maybe all those walls she hit that made her forget." Mog pressed on.

"Whatever. Next one is from Cherry-Sama, basicly, why did you help clean the classroom and how did you trip and break the wal, also what did it feel like?" Mao asked.

"Oh, well, I wanted to help out since it was so dusty, but then I think something or someone tripped me. Whatever it was, it kinda looked like Mithos' leg, but he wasn't there in that event so..." Colette trailed.

Off stage...again.

Everyone all stared at Mithos, who gave an innocent look. "What?"

"You're so evil." Sheena eyed him.

"I'm the main villain, what do you expect?" Mithos sarcasticly remarked.

Back on stage.

"I think I know who did it...(cough)Mithos(Cough)" Mao said.

"And the wall felt like paper..." Colette added.

"PAPER?" Both of the hosts gasped.

Off stage.

Yuan looked at the director. "Paper? You made the school's walls which were meant to be wood...Out of paper?" Yuan asked with an rasied eyebrow.

"What! Forcesystus screwed his lines up and we had to build the place from scratch! And...We had a low budget..." The director went into defense.

Back on stage.

"Kupo! Let's carry on, last interview question, this one is from AngelicAzure, why do you trip all the time? Are you getting paid, um you don't look where your going or just plain clumsy?" Mog asked.

"I vote the last option." Mao raised his hand.

"Ummmm...Well, I guess I keep getting distracting by shiny things." Colette answered.

"Shiny things?" Mog pondered.

"Yeah, or by cute things like butterflies and kitties and puppies!" Colette cheered.

That was when Mr. Tickles walked on stage by accident.

"Who the hell brought the cat in here?" Mao asked.

Colette looked at the kitty. "Cutie!!"

Mithos dashed on set and grabbed the kitten before Colette could get her hands on him/her/it.

"Do NOT touch him/her/it, you failure!" Mithos snapped.

"Kupo. Do you mind? We're in the middle of an interview." Mog asked.

"I have a good way of getting him out." Mao smiled evily.

Just then a blue screen with the "Moogle theme" with Moogles on it with on of them holding the sign saying "Due to the strong violence, this scene has been censored, please wait until the scene is finished. Thank you".

About 3 minutes later, Mao returned.

"You do know that you that Mithos had to the hospital to recover from his wounds." Mog sighed.

"What? It worked didn't it?" Mao shurgged.

"That was scary..." Colette blinked.

"Oh yeah, I forgot. Okay, final last question, what will you do after the game?" Mao asked.

"That's easy! Me and Lloyd are going on our first date!" Colette cheerfully said.

"...What...?" Mao paused until he said one word plainly.

"How nice!" Mog jumped for joy.

Off stage.

"Lloyd! You were going on your first date without consulting me?" Kratos glared.

"I know you're my dad and all, but I don't need permission for everything." Lloyd fought back.

"Not while I exist, Lloyd." Kratos retorted.

"Kratos is so protective..." Genis sweatdropped.

Back on stage.

"Well, hopefully your date won't go wrong, Colette." Mog nodded.

"That's all for Colette's interview. Our next guest is the miniture brainbox, Genis." Mao said.

"BRAINBOX?" Genis shouted from off set.

"Please send your questions in for any questions for Genis to answer. Just name it! Well from me, Mao and Colette. Toodles!" Mog explained and waved with his small little paws.

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ME: Well, what do you think? Please review as I would like to know or as Mog said, to ask any questions you want to ask Genis. Well, I better go and work on the other stories. Moogle Empress sign out!

Moogle: Kupo!


	5. Interview: Genis

ME: I'm so sorry for not updating at all! I'm such a horrible Authoress! But having no computer at home can be a bit hard.

Mithos: That's no excuse.

ME: T.T

Ion: Don't be mean, she must been very busy.

ME: Awwww! You're so nice!

Mithos: Hey! I get hit by you but he doesn't?

Ion: (Has question mark over his head)

ME: That's because you don't know when to keep your lips shut. Anyway, please enjoy this chapter!

Mog: Kupo!

**Interview: Genis**

"Hi everyone. Welcome back to the interviews!" Mog cheered.

"Yeah, like Mog said." Mao shurgged.

"Emo as usual." Mog smirked.

"Whatever, anyway, here we have the miniture brainbox of the team and brother of the ruin manaic, Genis." Mao shurgged again and then returned to speaking to the invisible crowd. (AN: You guys. XD)

"Hey! I'm not a brainbox!" Genis protested.

"Everyone seems to think so." Mao smirked.

"Grrrrrr..."

"Okay! Let's get underway! So Genis, how did you get your role?" Mog interupted the two.

"Huh? Well, my agent called me while I was trying to get the role of Harry in the latest Harry Potter film." Genis answered.

"What? You?" Mao blinked.

"I could of been Harry, okay, Mao? Stop looking at me like that." Genis narrowed his eyes.

"So I guess it didn't work so you got the role of Genis?" Mao smiled.

"Hey! My acting was good!" Genis protested again.

"Guys, save your heated verbal battle after the show, kay?" Mog grew a vain and tried to stay calm.

"Humph! Fine then, anyway then, let's get down to the questions."

"Fine, let's." Genis sighed and sat down on the chair.

"The first one is from RoyalFanatic, It says: What was it like getting slapped by Raine and did you ever get revenge?" Mog replied.

"Hey! That's a good question! Do tell us!" Mao became curious.

"Are you kidding me? Of course I got revenge! Who do you think keep stealing her history books? And all the artifacts that was in the game that she got?" Genis smirked.

"That was you?" Mao asked.

Off set however...

"WHAT!? GENIS...I'LL KILL YOU!!!!!!" Raine steamed and nearly stomped on to the stage if Kratos was holding back along with everyone else.

Back on set.

"Errr...She won't be very happy once she finds out. Kupo..." Mog sweatdropped.

"Um, oh well, to the next letter! These are from Cherry-Sama again. Why do you wear weird outfits?" Mao asked.

"HEY! That was not MY FAULT! I blame it on the costume designer! It's because of that Katz outfit, that Mithos won't leave me alone!!" Genis tottaly freeked.

Mao and Mog sweatdroppd.

"Now I see..." Mao replied.

"Ahem! Let's continue, kupo. This one is from Hiraneas, she asks, um...Do you like Mithos?" Mog responded.

"...What?" Genis managed to squeek out.

"Just answer the question! Do you like him or not?!" Mao snapped.

"That's personal! I'm telling anyone about my lovelife!" Genis snapped back.

"So it's true?" Mao raised an eyebrow.

"No comment!" Genis stated.

"Tch, fine. Anyway, next question from AngelicAzure and by Kusabi Makabe, How does it feel to have Raine of a sister and does she cook?" Mao read the next letter.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Do you know what it's like to have Raine for a sister? It's embrassing! You can't walk down a street without her gawking at some antique in a shop." Genis shouted, obviously, having Raine as a sister was a tramatzing thing.

"Dude, that's bad." Mao agreeing with Genis for once.

"Raine will be Raine." Mog chirped.

"Anyway, cooking wise, no she can't even cook in reality! All those people who got sick by her cooking was done without even trying." Genis said.

Off set.

Raine was getting her staff ready to smite down on her brother with flaming eyes that were growing.

Back on set.

"Kupo! Let's head on the next letter brought in by Bronakk, why are you so short?" Mog said.

"I'm actually younger than I appear. I should be 12 in the story, but I'm actually 9." Genis smirked.

"What?! You're nine with the IQ of a 20 year older and onwards?" Mao blinked.

"Yup." He simply answered.

"Coooolllll." Mog awed.

"No wonder your so damn short! Oh well this one is from FreekyAnimegal, she says why are you such a candyass? Hee hee! I like how she thinks." Mao smiled.

"Hey! Anyway, that's my character for you, I was paid to act like that character. That's the whole point!" Genis hissed.

"Well, I guess that's true. Well, next question then is from Nicole, Why are you so smart and are clever in real life?" Mog said.

"That's one of the benifits of having Raine for, I actually was taught by her. So basicly yeah." Genis laughed.

"I should of known...Well to the next question that was sent by Eternum123, How does it feel to be one of the youngest members?" Mao read the letter.

"To be honest, degrading. I mean, Lloyd's an idiot and even I have more common sense than he does." Genis said.

"I know what you mean." Mao smirked.

Off set...Again...

"Hey! Why that little-!" Lloyd was about to rush on to the stage but was stopped when Mithos hit him with one of Colette's pow hammers that he stole-I mean "borrowed".

Back on set with Mao, Mog and Genis.

"Well, we're nearly finished now." Mog cheered.

"Finally...Well, the next question sent by Kemix, Why do you always diss Zelos and try to kill him?" Mao sighed.

"Hah! That's because I feel like it! He always dissed me off stage, so think of it as "sweet" revenge." Genis said.

"Well, I must agree with you. Even I get the urge to multilate him when I get the best chance." Mao nodded.

"Guys, let's concerate here! Anyway Viarourafox has sent this question, are you basicly in love with Mithos again or any other male counterpart?" Mog replied.

"Not again! No! I'm not saying anything!" Genis whined.

"Well, here's one from Zorfendor, why do you fight with a kendama, of all the other weapons you got of had?" Mao asked.

"You know? I wanted to ask the director that too." Genis thoughtfully said.

"So you don't know?"

"Not really, but I have to say, it does seem...kinda weak..." Genis sighed.

"Well, only two reviewers left! Here's the next question from Mangadork and an anonymous reviewer have one thing in common to ask, is your hair actually white?" Mog asked.

"Yeah! What did you think was?" Genis nodded.

Both Mao and Mog sweatdropped.

"I pity you...Well last question, what will you do after TOS?" Mao said.

"Hopefully find a better role than a hero's sidekick." Genis narrowed his eyes.

"Well, you might want to start running, because Lloyd and Raine is coming at you at full throtlle" Mao pointed behind Genis.

"What? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" Genis looked behind him and then sprinted as if his life depended on it.

Lloyd and Raine zoomed right past the stage after Genis.

"Well, that's all for today. Next time, we will be talking to the Ruin manic and child abuser, Raine!" Mog cheered.

"Ahhhhh!" Genis was screaming bloody murder from off set.

"Please send you questions you wish to ask Raine ASAP. Well bye for now."

"See ya!"

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ME: Well, what do you think? Please review as I would like to know or as Mog said, to ask any questions you want to ask Genis. Well, I better go and work on the other stories. Moogle Empress sign out!

Moogle: Kupo!


	6. Interview: Raine

ME: Yo there everyone! I finally got my lazy brain into gear and start the new interview!

Mithos: Man, for all we know, it might take you another few years to update, or was it a hundred years?

ME: Shut up! (Glares daggers at Mithos)

Mog: Shall we start? Kupo?

ME: Yes, let's.

Lloyd: I hope this will be good after making your readers wait so godamn long.

ME: Hey! I'll do the best I can possible! Well, here it is! Raine's interview!

Mog: Kupo!

**Interview: Raine**

The set was turned on as the new interview began.

"Hello again, everyone! Welcome back to our TOS interviews. Kupo." Mog cheered to the crowd.

"Yeah, joy. Well, so far we had the dumb hero, the klutzy blonde, the miniture brainbox and now...we have the Ruin-manic/Child abuser." Mao responded to the crowd as well.

"Yup! And Mao and I are your hosts as we interview all the TOS cast. Where did you get the idea that Raine abuses Genis?" Mog added before turning to Mao.

"Didn't you see the state Genis was in?! He had to go to hospital straight after the interview." Mao pointed off set.

"Wow, really?" Mog blinked.

"Yeah, by the way, why aren't you hiding in a corner somewhere? You DO know that this is Raine that we are going to interview. Last time, she tried to dissect you for the sake of "science." Mao empathised the last word while teasing his co-host.

"Aha! I come prepared! I know Raine hates water, so..." Mog pointed out and showed a bucket of water which was next to his seat. "I got a bucket of water to use, kupo." Mog said.

"THAT'S your plan?!" Mao blinked as if the Moogle grew another head.

"...Yeah."

"...Nevermind, just introduce her and let's get it over with."

"Okay! Let's introduce our next guest, who's admired by her fans as beautiful, intelligent and-" Mog started before Mao interupted.

"And a woman who molests ruins and belongs in a psycho ward?" Mao added.

"I heard that!" Raine snapped from off set.

"Um, anyway, kupo. Here she is! Raine Sage!" Mog sweatdropped and cued her.

Raine arrives on set and before she sits down, she whacks Mao with her book that she brought with her.

"OW! What did I do?" Mao hissed.

"I heard your little snide remark." Raine glared down as if she was scolding a student, which Lloyd is very familer with. Like right now off set, Lloyd was huddled in a corner somewhere.

"Scary..." Lloyd squeeked.

"Umm, sorry about that Raine. Shall we start the questions? Kupo?" Mog pointed to the chair.

"I guess so. Considering that's why you people bribed me to come here." Raine sighed and sat down.

Somewhere off stage, the director whistled after hearing the word "bribe".

"Well, first question. How did you get the role as the scholar?" Mao asked before muttering under his tone. "And how you got the part I'll NEVER know..."

"Hmmm, well, I was researching some tablets that I found when I got a call from my agent. At first after I heard the role, I was going to decline until she mentioned there would be ruins. After that, I quickly took the role." Raine answered.

"What?! You took the role just for the ruins?!" Mao blinked.

"Yes, is something wrong?" Raine glared daggers at Mao once again.

"Uhhh...no." Mao felt very weak against her glare.

"Ahem! Anyway, kupo, here are the other questions brought to you by the TOS fans. This one is from Animesage: How does it feel to be one of the most superior and beautiful of the Tales girls?" Mog recited.

"Ugh, it's a fanboy isn't it?" Mao rolled his eyes at this.

"Well, I never really thought about it. I've been more engrossed in my archelogical finds than thinking about such things." Raine answered.

"...In other words, you don't really care." Mao smiled. His reward for his snide remark was another whack on the head with her book.

"Kupo...Anyway, it's your turn, Mao." Mog said.

"Huh? Oh yeah." Mao was now rubbing the part of his head that was stinging with pain. "This one is from AccessBlade. What's it like having Lloyd as a student? Heh heh, I knew someone was going to ask that."

"It's a nightmare!! Do have ANY idea what it's like trying to get knowledge into that small grey matter of his?! He sleeps in my lessons and he can't even count 2+2 together! He's a total wreck! But at least I get some justice when I throw my chalk at him." Raine complained.

"Really? Because in real-life, Lloyd is actually much smarter than he is in the game. He told us himself." Mao shrugged.

"He did?" Raine blinked.

"Yup." Mog nodded.

"...Oh my lord, there is a god somewhere." Raine muttered.

"Is it that hard to beleive?" Mao questioned.

"Let's see you trying to educate him!" Raine narrowed her eyes.

"Tempting, but I prefer my job as an interviewer, that way I get to poke fun at you all." Mao smirked evily before getting pulverized by Raine again.

"Moving on from that, these questions are from freakyanimegal456. Here's the first one, have you ever been tried for Child Abuse?" Mog swiftly moved on to the next question while Mao was recovering from his brief beating from Raine.

"Of course not! I've done nothing of the sort." Raine strongly said.

"Then what are these then?" Mao points to the whiteboard next to them and shows pictures of the events that happened in the game where Raine had whacked them.

"That is was in the game only! The script told me to do that!" Raine retorted.

"I guess that's true, kupo. Don't you think the authorities would have detained Raine by now if she did get accused of it?" Mog agreed.

"Whatever. The second question that freakyanimegal asked was...what the hell?!" Mao looked at the card and swore loudly.

"Well?" Both Raine and Mog asked.

"Um, Raine, is there a possible slight chance that you and Yuan are dating or something?" Mao asked.

"Why?" Raine became skeptical.

"Well, she asked if you would ever get married to Yuan." He finally told them the question.

This question made Raine blush deeply while there was some screaming off set.

"YOU TWO TIMER!!" Martel screeched before she whacked a certain blunette half-elf with her staff.

"Wait! Martel! I can explain-!!"

"Go sis go!" Mithos cheered his sister on.

"Well, that answered our question." Mao sighed.

"Let's move on, shall we?" Mog sweatdropped.

"Y-yes." Raine was still dazed.

"Ahem, well then, next question is from one from Royal fanatic, her question is 'what was it like teaching Genis, Lloyd, and Colette, and had there ever been any times when you wished you weren't a teacher anymore?" Mog spoke.

"Genis and Colette are not the problem. It's Lloyd who gives me most of the mirgranes and stress I get everyday teaching him, sometimes it makes me wonder if it's worth the effort of teaching him." Raine simply answered.

"Wow, Lloyd must really suck in the game's story." Mao answered.

"Hey, aren't you going to ask the next one, kupo?" Mog poked.

"Oh yeah, this one is from Zorfendor, how do you react when people think your Genis' mother than his sister?" Mao recited from the card.

"Ugh, not this again. I'm Genis' sister! I know that I look old enough to his mother but I his sister, you hear me?!" Raine grabbed Mao's shirt and shook him roughly.

"Okay okay okay!" Mao repeated to get the message through to her.

"Good." She then dropped the dazed and dizzy Mao on the floor.

"Errr...Should I just move on the next one?" Mog asked quietly.

"I think you should." Raine nodded sharply.

"Well this one is from Kusabi Makabe, how many artifacts have you collected?" Mog asked.

"Oh, well let's if you count all the ones that I stole from Derris Kharlan...I say around 3007 artifacts." Raine simply answered.

"3007?!" Both of the interviewers gapped.

"Yes?" Raine raised an eyebrow.

"Geez, how do you hide it all in our house? It must be totally cluttered!" Mao asked.

"Oh, I have my ways. What they are, I'm not telling you, or anyone."

"Tch, fine. Like I wanted to know anyways." Mao hissed, bring out is emo mood.

"I can see how you and Kratos are related." Mog smiled.

"Well, this next question comes from Cherry-sama, How do you carry all your stuff around during your quest? I sure hope you didn't ask Noishe to carry it." Mao asked Raine.

"..."

"You didn't!" Mao's eyes widened.

"I might have..." Raine sweatdropped while she shifted her eyes.

"Whine..." Noishe whined at the memory of carry all her stuff around off set. It was something that would haunt the poor Protozoan for the rest of his doggy days.

"Honestly Raine! He's not a horse or a camel!" Mao snapped.

"He looked big enough!" Raine fired back.

"Guys, let's stick with the program. The last of the people who asked these questions is Anonymous, his/her question is 'what do you mean 'Pure' at Lake Umacy?" Mog said.

"Why do you people keep asking me this?! I haven't done anything with Kratos or anyone! I mean it! What is with these perverted questions?!" Raine finally snapped, she had been asked this question so many times, it was enough to make her want to cast judgement, even though she couldn't.

"Okay, okay! We beleive you! But still, why did you say pure if that was the case?" Mao tried to calm her down before she tried to blow up the set.

"Ahem, well, I did have a boyfriend once. But it wasn't Kratos or any of the characters in the game!" Raine admitted.

"So your former boyfriend is outside the game? Hmmm, the plot thickens." Mao smirked.

"Just ask me the last question before I slap you." Raine's eye twitched.

"Fine fine, the last question, finally, what will you do after TOS?" Mao rolled his eyes.

"Hmmm, maybe I'll go on a world tour to see all the ruins in the world! Muahahhahahaahaha!" Raine went into ruin-mode at the thought.

"Oh god, I wish I never said it now." Mao sighed.

"Well, that's all from us now. I have to say, this was our biggest number of questions yet. Maybe it's true what they say about Raine being the most popular of the Tales girls." Mog shurgged.

"And the most violent one besides Sheena." Mao smiled.

Raine had only just relaized what Mog was and was about to attempt to capture him.

"Ahh! Back Raine! Back I say! I got water and I'm not afraid to use it!" Mog threaten with his bucket of water that he had near his chair and threw it at Raine.

Dispite Raine being drenched, she didn't seem fazed at all. "Hadn't anyone told you that I don't mind small amounts of water? It's only oceans, rivers and lakes that I fear." Raine smiled evily.

"Oh...Fluffy bunnies..." Mog sweatdropped in fear. Within a few minutes after...

"KUPOOOOO!!" Mog dashed off set with a ruin-manic after him with a net to capture him with.

"Ugh, I hate this part of the job...Well, that's all the time we had with Raine, well since she's too busy trying to abduct my co-host. Be here for our next interview where we talk to the character that has all the fangirls that you could possibly find in the world at his feet. This is the character that some of you may have been biding your time to see, so our next interview is with-"

"Me?" Lloyd came out.

"No! We had you already!" Mao kicked him back to the side of the set, where Lloyd had crashed to the ground taking some props off set with him.

"Then is it the great, sexy and gorgous Zelos Wilder?" Zelos gave his usual flirtaous smile.

"Not you! You're later!" Mao casted 'indignation' on him.

"...The...pain..."

"Who I actually was talking about was none other than my own big brother, Kratos Aurion!" Mao grinned.

"..." Kratos came out with sigh and his usual "..." trademark.

"Heh heh, I get to interview you next, Krattie. I wonder what kind of questions they'll ask me. Of course, they could just ask me since I know you better than anyone." Mao had a cat-like grin on his face.

"Can I ask for a replacement?"

"No! You have me and Mog, buddy. Don't you you'll get out of his one. Well, be here for when we talk to Krattie or as you guys know him as Kratos. All questions will be accepted and asked in the upcoming interview. Now, if you excuse me everyone, I got a co-host to rescue." Mao told the invisable crowd before heading off set to save Mog from Raine.

"...See you in the next interview then." Kratos simply said before going back off set.

"Raine! Stop trying to dissect my co-host!! I need him to the next interview!" Mao's voice was heard from off set before the curtains were closed.

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Well, that's that! I'm sorry I took so long to finish it. But you heard Mao, the next interview is all about Kratos! So all you fangirls and reviewers out there please send in your questions that you've been dying to ask Kratos about, but couldn't until now. Good luck and see you in the next interview, til then, happy reading guys! Moogle Empress out!

Moogle: Kupo!

Mog: KUPO!! (knocks his fellow Moogle to the ground)


	7. Interview: Kratos

ME: Yo there everyone! I finally got my lazy brain into gear and start the new interview! I'm so sorry for not updating at all. I went on a very long hiatus. Hopefully I'll start updating some stories that are like three years old or at least haven't been updated in ages! O.o

Mithos: Man, for all we know, it might take you another few years to update, or was it a hundred years?

ME: Shut up! (Glares daggers at Mithos)

Mog: Shall we start? Kupo?

ME: Yes, let's.

Lloyd: I hope this will be good after making your readers wait so godamn long.

ME: I know, I'm awful! Please forgive me! (Bows for forgiveness) Well, here's the one you've all been waiting for, it's the Kratos interview!

Kratos:...

ME: Just to let you know a certain fangirl will make her debut in this interview, I asked her permission and asked if she could write her own intro into the interview, since it would feel more like it came from her instead of me just writing it out. I hope you're ready, Kratos. X3

Kratos: (Twitches) WHAT?!

Mog: Kupo!

**Interview: Kratos**

The set was turned on as the new interview began.

"Hello again, everyone! Welcome back to our TOS interviews. Kupo." Mog cheered to the crowd.

"Yeah, we managed to save Mog from become Raine's new science toy." Mao added.

"...You have no idea how long I spent in mental thearpy getting over it." Mog sighed.

"Well, at any rate. You guys are probably pretty excited about this interview, because this interview is for one of the most popular Tales characters ever known." Mao told the crowd.

"Yup, this character was charted in the Namco's offical second Tales of populairty contest as the first place winner, and also the stealer of many fangirls and possibly fanboys' hearts." Mog informed.

"Well, here he is everyone, the character that you've all been waiting for, for he is the one and only, Kratos Aurion!" Mao introduced as Kratos was pretty much dragged on stage by Yuan.

"Stop being a wuss and do your interview damn it!" Yuan gave Kratos one more push before heading off set again.

"Trying to run off again?" Mao smirked.

"I hate you so much right now." Kratos hissed.

"Hey, that's what little brothers are for." Mao shurgged it off and headed for the interview chairs.

"Look at it this way, the sooner you get it over with, the sooner you can leave." Mog told the auburn cruxis angel.

"Hmph, very well." Kratos gave in and sat down on the interview chair.

"So then first thing then Kratos, how did you get the role as a brooding, mysterious mercernary who is revealed to be not only an angel, but one of the former heroes of four thousand years ago and the father of Lloyd?" Mog asked the first question.

"Do you really want to know?" Kratos asked.

"Isn't it because you were popular in other roles too? I mean let's face it, your voice has been through a whole range of characters." Mao suggested.

"Alright, that saves me explaining the reason then." Kratos simply said.

"What? Hey!" Mao snapped.

"Ahem, next question, kupo." Mog nudged his co-host.

"Right, right. This is from an Anymonous reviewer....Heh heh heh..." Mao read the card and couldn't help but snicker at this.

"...What?"

"He asked that 'would you get a sex change and marry him?" Mao smiled evily.

"...." Kratos' eye twitched a few times, but other than that, he remained stoic and silent.

"I'm just going to go ahead and just ask the next question, right?" Mog sweatdropped, seeing the glare on Kratos' face.

"Yeah, I guess so. Otherwise, we'd have the entire Kratos fangirl population in an uproar." Mao was trying to supress his laugh for his older brother's sake.

"Uh, okay, Kupo. Next question, this one is from Star Guy....Uh...Maybe I shouldn't read this out."

"What is it, Mog?" Mao turned to his furry co-host.

"Just say it." Kratos sighed.

"Well, he beleives or rather theorizes that you are married to Raine in secret and torture Genis in front of her. Moogle Empress? Is this the right letter?" Mog asked the authoress from her hiding place.

"WHAT?!" Genis and Raine screamed from off set.

"Dad?!" Lloyd blinked in shock.

"Um, is that true Kratos?" Mao asked.

"Of course not! I am still married to Anna! The nerve of that-!!"Kratos snapped and went into a long line of colourful curses that were censored because this was a child-friendly programme.

"Yikes! Kratos actually got angry and SWORE!" Mao jumped.

Kratos took a few gasps before he did a slight 'ahem'. "Okay, I am done now."

"I take it Star-Guy's on your 'to Kill list' now?" Mao pointed.

"Yes..."

Mog and Mao sweatdropped and looked at each other with worried looks.

"M-moving on! Next letter, Evelyn Dark has two questions to ask you. The first one is 'Have you or Anna ever dropped Lloyd on the head?'" If you did that, it sure would be scary since Lloyd's amazingly an straight A guy in reality outside the game." Mao asked the next question.

"....Nooooo..." Kratos sweatdropped and looked away.

"You did, didn't you?" Mao smirked evily.

"It was only four times." Kratos faintly blushed, it was only a little, but it was there.

"How many times Anna drop Lloyd?" Mog asked innocently.

"...None." Kratos sighed.

"Geez, you suck at childcare!" Mao laughed.

"I dropped you a few times when you were a baby as well, you know." Kratos narrowed his eyes.

"You what?!"

"Mao, please not on the live broadcast." Mog stopped his co-host before it got ugly.

"Fine, the second question by the same reviewer, 'What were your thoughts when you learned you had to use washtubs to get to the Thoda Gyeser?'" Mao answered after growling.

"I thought "Why of **ALL **things, washtubs? Couldn't the film crew use a boat instead?" Kratos answered.

"Hey! We were on a short budget! And with most of the money being used to rebuilding the Iselia set after Forcestyus screwed up his lines and for all the food for the entire crew, washtubs were all we could buy!" The director defended himself.

"I said I was sorry." Forcestyus sniffed off set.

"Oookaayy...So basicly you got washtubs instead because you were being a cheap-" Mao shurgged.

"Mao..." Kratos interjected.

"Okay, next question, kupo. This question is from Scorch the Hedgehog, 'Why weren't you in Dawn of The New World?" Mog read the letter out.

"It is called the storyline, the script said that I would fly away on a giant ball of mana and never be seen again. That's what it says on the offical Namco story script for the game." Kratos answered as if he had been asked this paticular question too many times.

"Ah I see, I guess it would be strange if you were able to come back without anything to come back with. But what about the Eternal Sword, couldn't that have teleported you back?" Mog asked.

"Even the Eternal Sword has limits, besides it's an CGI sword. It's not real."

"IT'S NOT?!" Lloyd and Mithos gasped off set.

"Trust them to beleive it was real." Kratos rolled his eyes.

"Huh, I wondered why I could never hold it when I used it." Mithos shurgged.

"Wait a minute, then did this sequel game even had a plot? I mean seriously when I first heard about it, I thought it looked like a Pokemon rip-off with Tales characters in it."

"But I guess if Kratos came back during 'Dawn of the New World', it would bring confusion into how he ever got back, considering it even took the Eternal sword's power to teleport him when Derris Kharlan was near the planet. So it would be nigh impossible for the sword to teleport him back from the edge of the so called 'Gravatational field." Mog said sagely.

"So..Basicly Kratos couldn't come back because the screwed up plot would be even more screwed in the sequel?" Mao asked.

"Most likely." Kratos nodded.

"And anyways, they don't even have ME in the sequel! Me! I was in TOS too, you know!" Mao noted.

"Uhh...Mao, you're an OC character. That means you're only an unoffical part of the TOS universe made up by the Authoress herself for her own fan-based story which hasn't even been updated in years. I don't think Namco knew you even existed, along with other OC characters made by so many other authors and authoresses in the TOS universe." Mog broke the news to him.

"Sniff...That's mean..." Mao sniffed.

"But it's the truth." Mog added.

"Shall we move on?"

"Yeah I guess so. Next letter then, this one is from Zorfendor. 'What did you love Anna for?' Hey, that makes sense, what did you see in her?" Mao read the letter.

"Well...Everything. I cannot really think of anything that stands out. Except that she's lethal when pregnant, _NEVER_go near Anna when she is pregnant. That's all I can say..." Kratos answered although cringed at the thought.

"Uh huh, Mog, if you will read the next letter." Mao turned to Mog.

"Sure! Next question is from Prosser783, 'How many girlfriends did you have over the last four thousand years?'"

"I did NOT have any other girlfirends besides than Anna. Please do **not **compare me to the womanizer of Lloyd's group." Kratos hissed.

"Someone called for the great sexy Zelos Wilder?" Zelos popped his head from the side.

"No! No one cares about you right now, Zelos! Wait until your interview!" Mao fired a giant fireball at Zelos, leaving an explosion on the right hand part of the set.

"The...pain..." Zelos whined.

"Right, next question," Mao sighed loudly before checking the next letter. "These questions are from Angelic Celina. First one is: What was your most funniest memory with Mithos, Yuan and Martel back in the Kharlan War?"

"Heh, when we tried to speak to the king of Sylvarant, four thousand years ago, Mithos had no choice but to dress up as a woman in order to get inside the castle. And amazingly, the soilders fell for it." Kratos smiled.

**Back off set...**

"Mithos?! You dressed up as a girl?!" Genis gasped in shock.

"Now that I think about it, it was a few hundred years after Cruxis started that he started to like wearing those spandex outfits. I wonder if that anything to do with the crossdressing event that Kratos mentioned." Yuan remembered what happened a few hundred years after Cruxis was estabished in the game.

"You see, this is why people call you a femboy or a shemale, whichever term those fangirls like best. Well...that and you look like a girl in physical appearence." Sheena pointed out.

Mithos was in a depressed corner, remembering that event as if it was yesterday. "I never want to remember that crossdressing scenario ever again! You have no idea how long I spent repressing that memory!"

"But Mithos-" Yuan started but Mithos stopped him halfway.

"NEVER AGAIN YOU HEAR ME!!" Mithos shouted to Yuan.

Back on the interview set.

"Man, that sucks for him. Why didn't Martel go in?" Mao asked.

"She was sick with the Chronic Angelus Crystallus Inofficium when that happened." Kratos answered.

"Ah, anyway, here's the second question. 'If you had stayed on Symphonia, what would have you done to Emil when he was trying to kill your son?'" Mao read the next question.

"I'm Lloyd's father, what WOULD you think I do?" Kratos sarcasticly asked.

"Okay, okay. No need to get touchy about it, answer the question though."

"Well, I would do the same thing to him." Kratos answered.

"Wait! You mean kill him?! Oh come on, that's just childish of-hey, wait a minute, that's not a bad idea, let's do that!" Mao got his mobile out and was about to call Emil.

"Mao! Don't even think it! Namco will get very angry if you kill Emil." Mog snapped.

"Aw, come on please? He's a wimp! No one would miss him, well, except Marta and maybe even Tenebrae. Look, even Astel and Ratatosk have bigger fanbases than him and Astel had been DEAD while Rataosk has to share Emil's body and even THEN he's more popular!" Mao begged.

"No! Put the mobile away...NOW."

"Stupid Moogle, he never let me have any fun." Mao mumbles to himself.

"Ahem." Kratos coughed.

"Ah, sorry Kratos! Okay, this is her third question. 'Do you hate Kraine fanfics?'" Mao looked his letter again.

"In one simple word: **Yes**." Kratos answered almost immeditately.

"Wow, that was the quickiest answer in this interview yet. So here is her last question. 'Was it love at first sight for you and Anna?" Mao rolled his eyes and read the last question.

"Well, I would not exactly say that. She first accused me of being a desian, and when I was helping her escape, she tried to knock me out with a plank of wood." Kratos recalled the event, and the pain of the bruise he received from it.

"Well, what do you expect? She _WAS _in a desian ranch, she might have thought you were a new grand cardinal or something." Mao sarcasticly replied.

"Kupo! A new question is called for! Let's see, this one is from Kemix. 'Would you ever think of making Raine your girlfriend?' Mog read the letter out.

"Are you insane? You would have to make me drunk before I even think about going out with her, epescially with her ruin-mode to take into account _AND _since I'm still married to Anna." Kratos grew a vein at this.

"Whatever you say, Kratos. Next question is from TOS fanatic, since we already know Lloyd is smart outside the game, even though I still refuse to beleive it, we'll just ask the first one. 'Where and how did you find Noishe?' Wait, didn't I find it?" Mao raised an eyebrow.

"That happened in ME's fan fic, Mao. Don't mix the two up." Mog answered.

"Oh...Well Kratos?"

"Would you beleive me if I said I found Noishe in a goldfish market?" Kratos asked.

The whole set was silent, so silent you could hear crickets in the background.

"You're joking, right?" Mao asked after the long silence.

"It's true. Noishe was still in his aquatic form when I found him, he was in the goldfish Market." Kratos shook his head.

"Wow...Poor Noishe..." Mog pitied the Protozoan.

"Mog?" Mao nudged.

"Oh right, next question, my friends. Next one is Shiankumo Bani. First question of hers, 'Do you get annoyed with people saying your name the same way as Kratos in God of War?' What the heck is God of War?" Mog read out.

"For once, I agree with one of these reviewers. Is it not hard to define the two names from each other, they may look the same but they sound different. How hard is it to confuse the two words?" Kratos answered.

"Uh huh, did anyone get any of that?" Mao asked the audience.

"Well, onwards to the reviewer's next question. 'Do you find it annoying to have so many fangirls? Note this warning: If you say 'Yes' to the above question, you WILL be mauled by fangirls." Wow, sounds serious." Mog blinked.

"Yes, it is annoying. I can't even walk the streets without getting stalked by someone. Last time it was an fangirl with a cricket named Fred. What was her name? Freakyanimegal?" Kratos nodded and remembered a certain fangirl who stalked him recently.

"Um...Yeah...about that...You know that ME's really good Fan friends with Freakyanimegal right?" Mao sweatdropped.

"...And?" Kratos went purple at this.

"Um, well...We kinda had no choice, ME gave her permission to see the interview." Mog sweatdropped as well.

"WHAT?! Damn you Moogle Empress!" Kratos jumped out of the chair.

And somewhere off set, the Authoress, Moogle Empress laughed evily.

(AN: This intro part was contributed by Freakyanimegal herself. Thanks again!)

Door opens, ominous smoke and lighting billows into the room as that song  
'world of the dead' plays from Princess Mononoke. A figure walks in, an evil  
grin visible through the smoke as it comes into focus.

"Well hello there, Kratos," she smirked evilly, lacing her hands together as  
she smirked, donning a pair of jeans and a shirt that reads 'I'm a ** and you  
love me for it', "I see you're in a predicament, here, nay? Hm hm hmh hm  
hm..."

"Oh cr-" Kratos starts.

Freakyanimegal attaches to Kratos' arm, grinning maniacally.

"RAWR! Your arms are SO hard and taut! Muscles baby, ROWR!"

"Cricket crick!" exclaimed fred the cricket from atop her head.

"What? The dramatic entrance? Oh come on, did you really expect me to be  
serious?!"

"Alright, since Freakyanimegal won't let go, you'll have to suffer with her until the interview finishes." Mao sighed.

"God, why have you forsaken me....?" Kratos sobbed as Freakyanimegal still latched on to Kratos' arm like a vice.

"Well, on to the next question, this one is from Accessblade. 'Who do you find more scary, Raine, Anna, or your daughter from Tales of Symphonia Remix (another ME fan fic) Amber?" Mao read out.

"Definately Anna, and Amber is just as scary as her mother sometimes." Kratos replied.

**Back off set once again....(We're going off set alot, aren't we readers? XD)**

"Amber! Dad said you were scary!" Lloyd told his sister.

"What?! Dad, you tratior!!" Amber was about to stomp on to set before the TOS crew managed to pull her back.

**Back in the Interview room with Kratos and everyone...**

"God, I swear, this interview has been an adventure all on it's own!" Mao complained.

"Well, let us continue! Kupo! This one is from Midnight's Heaven. 'What is like having Mao for a brother?'" Mog read out.

"No way! A question about me?! Kratos, you better answer good or I'll indignate you back to Derris Kharlan." Mao warned.

"What can I say about you other than you're smart-mouthed, more angst-ridden than any other character I met and you have the impulse of a ticking timebomb." Kratos answered.

"Geez, is that what you see me as? I wasn't that angst-ridden! Not as much as that Sync guy from Tales of the Abyss."

**Somewhere far away, on the TOTA set...**

"Achoo! Wait a minute, had someone been talking about me behind my back? Well? Speak up!" Sync said to the camera crew.

"You mean you heard voices just now? He's crazy! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" Luke asked before running away screaming.

The rest of the cast sighed.

"Why was he picked to be the main character again?" Sync pointed to Luke who was out of the studio now.

"That eludes me even now." Jade shurgged his shoulders.

"I'll go and get him." Tear sighed and followed him.

**Back in the Interview room**

"Well, we're nearly at the end of our questions now, kupo. These ones are from Royal Fanatic. First question is: Were you ever bored during your time in Cruxis?" Mog spoke.

"Depending on how you define bored..."

"Okay, we'll leave it at that I guess. Second question is 'What were your honest feelings about the trio you hanged out with in the Kharlan War?" Mog asked.

"Well, Martel had no flaws at all. But the other two, I always asked Yuan if his hair was dyed or not but he would never answer," Kratos started.

"IT'S NATURAL!" Yuan yelled at Kratos from off set.

"For Mithos, even though he was a gifted pupil, he always worried me with his fetish over cats."

"I don't have a fetish!" Mithos retorted as well.

"Hmmm, intresting. Maybe these questions will be brought up again in their own interviews. Anyway, last question. 'Why didn't you try to change the script so you could stay on Symphonia?" Mog replied.

"I am but a mere character, I have no control over the story, only Namco have that power. They do however keep shipping me in the Radiant Mythology games and make me appear as an special guest enemy on various other Tales games." Kratos sighed.

"I got an idea! We could kill Emil, and switch you as the hero in Dawn of the New World!" Mao clicked an idea.

"...." Everyone was silent yet again.

"Well we could..." Mao added.

"Forget it, Mao. We're _NOT _killing Emil, it wouldn't even make sense and the game is already out. Why do you hate him so much anyway?" Mog retorted.

"None of your bussiness. Besides, who's interview is this? Kratos' or mine?" Mao huffed.

"Okay, okay. I'm not going to argue with my co-host. Now that I think about it, you have the last letter." Mog said.

"Oh yeah, alright, last reviewer question. This one is from another annoyomus with a name called 'Just some random lurker'. 'Are you with Rai-"

"I know what this question is and for the last time: NO!!" Kratos stopped him before he even finished.

"Well, that made my job more easier. The other question the reviewer asked was: Can you juggle?" Mao finished the letter and threw it away with the others.

"That's it, I'm leaving." Kratos started to get up.

"Wait! We still have one more question! What are you going to do after the game, kupo?" Mog spoke out before Kratos could move.

"Something that doesn't involve me getting anymore fangirls than I already have." Kratos simply said, still trying to pull off Freakyanimegal.

They soon heard the door of the studio getting banged on, so Mog went to investigate, when he came back..."Better start praying Kratos, there's a horde of fangirls outside the studio. I guess that threat that Shiankumo Bani mentioned was true after all."

"So, I am trapped in this studio for good?" Kratos asked.

"At least until the fangirls go home." Mao smirked.

"Well, that's all we have time for this interview, but please tune in with us again when we talk to tomboy ninja, Sheena!" Mog turned to the camera.

"My interview's next? Awesome! Bring it on." Sheena punched the air.

"So from me, Mog, Kratos and...No! Bad Freaky! Bad! We do not glomp and kiss Kratos off-screen, think of what Anna, Lloyd and Amber would say!! Back fangirl, back I say!" Mao said before he saw Freakyanimegal molesting poor Kratos.

"See you in the next interview, until then, see you." Mog waved at the camera before trying to help Mao save Kratos.

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ME: Alright! Everyone enjoyed that? That must be my longest interview yet, then again, this IS Kratos we're talking about.

Kratos: SAVE ME DAMN IT! YOU BROUGHT HER HERE!

ME: Aw suck it up like a man, Kratos. What's the worse can Freakyanimegal do to you?

Mithos: If you have any questions for Sheena in the next interview, please post them in your review. Hopefully ME won't leave this hanging like she does with the other fan fics.

ME: Well, I have been thinking of doing a Tales of the Abyss Bloopers, but only if it's requested, I might think about doing a blooper fan fic for my other fan fic, Tales of Symphonia Remix, in response to Midnight's heaven's request, again, only if requested.

Colette: Wow, good luck in your interview Sheena!

Sheena: Thanks, man. I hope that stupid chosen doesn't try to film me during it.

Zelos: Awww! How did you know?

ME: Well, from me and everyone here. See you in the next interview!

Kratos: Back, back I say! I'll cast indignation on you if you come near me!

ME: Shut up already, would you Kratos? (Throws Pow hammer and knocks out Kratos) Oh....Um, feel free do whatever you want with him Freaky. n.n


End file.
